This week's episode of the Bachelor Pad was important.
ABC held a 'Kissing Contest'.
In an attempt to gain immunity, remain eligible for the $250,000 and stay in 'The Bachelor Pad', the 15 contestants will be blind folded and kiss each other. The contestant with the most votes for 'Best Kiss' wins a rose and can't be eliminated this week.
This Bachelorette recap starts with a letter addressed to any Executives from ABC who might be reading so, if you’re not from ABC, feel free to skip ahead.
Dear ABC Executive,
If I ever meet you, I’m going to punch you in the gums.
"Hey America! We just put together hours and hours of footage from a week's worth of taping and could only produce an hour-long show so, we're gonna throw in a pointless interview of two insane people as filler!
"We were all in, just, complete and utter shock. I can't believe this is happening."
What could this quote from Chris L. be referencing? Did the contestants on the 'Bachelorette' just find out someone had died? Was there a devasting fire? Did Ali just fall down the stairs and bruise her ribs?
No. That's Chris' response to the cocktail party being cancelled.
I start with this statement because I was pretty harsh on last week's mentor, Shania Twain. Her music is awful. I own a couple of Harry Conick's CD's and admit this while fully aware that his crap is probably just as bad to some people as Shania's crap is to me.
My wife got me a Himalayan Salt Rock Lamp for my birthday. Salt Rocks release negative ions into the air when they come into contact with moisture. I was shooing the negative ions out the window until my wife explained to me that they're a good thing.
You see, negative ions attach themselves to pollen, mold, and fart particles and destroy them without prejudice.
I don't play the lottery, so I'll never have $100 million. Unless, I'm holding a cheeseburger and Albert Haynesworth and I are stranded in a desert. Then I could sell the cheeseburger to him for $100 million. It pays to always have a cheeseburger somewhere on your person.
As sports fans, we're no stranger to these ludicrous deals given to athletes.
'The Bachelor' has narrowed his choice down to 2 girls. But, instead of ending the show like any network with an ounce of compassion would, ABC always decides to drag their season out one more episode with 'The Women Tell All' week. That's when all of the hoochies come back for one last stab at attention before fading out of the public eye; unless, of course, one of the girls gets arrested.
Here is a Power-Ranking of the injuries I'd least like to witness or suffer.
This topic came about while Mike Schopp and the Bulldog were discussing Thomas Vanek's recent fractured jaw. Mike seemed to think a broken face is the worst pain you could experience. Chris wanted nothing to do with re-habbing a torn achilles tendon.
To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 1 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy tips.; Golf; WGR; Jeremy White; Tri-County Country Club; Steve Warzala; To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 2 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy tips.; tournament; WGR; Jeremy White; Golf; Tri-County Country Club; Steve Warzala; To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 3 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy tips.; Golf; WGR; Jeremy White; Tri-County Country Club; Steve Warzala; To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 4 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy.; To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 5 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy.; Golf; WGR; Jeremy White; Tri-County Country Club; Steve Warzala; To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 6 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy.; Golf; WGR; Jeremy White; Tri-County Country Club; Steve Warzala; To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 7 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy.; Golf; WGR; Jeremy White; Tri-County Country Club; Steve Warzala; To prepare you for the WGR Celebrity Golf Tournament 2008, this video focuses on Hole 8 at Tri-County Country Club's course. Video hosts Jeremy White and Steve Warzala will share each hole's layout and strategy.; Golf; WGR; Jeremy White; Tri-County Country Club; Steve Warzala;
