PROBLOGUE: Madonna being in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame is the worst. I have no proof, but the fact that Chuck Day, who wrote the guitar riff for "Secret Agent Man," died on the day her election was announced has to mean something. You know who else died that day? Kurt Eberling, Sr. -- the inventor of the Spaghetti-O.
"You see, it's spaghetti, just in the shape of an 'O.' Whaddya think?"
Some of you may know that I am heavily and mentally invested in "rock and roll" music, and so it was with a mix of intrigue and trepidation that I tuned into
Mike Schopp and The Bulldog's discussion of who would belong on the Mount Rushmore of Rock.
As a caller pointed out, to me there's a difference between "rock" and "rock and roll," (I've told you I'm a nerd), but I felt inclined to participate via this space. The whole thing is even more self-indulgent than you think, especially when you learn who I picked and how it matches up to the "Three-to-sevenners" (I'm running out of ways to say their name).
A lot of the reader comments on the afternoon show's page feel false to me in that they seem to be personal Mount Rushmores of Rock, not who "belongs" on this list. If I built a personal one in my backyard, which I may do, it would have Bruce Springsteen, Johnny Cash, Elliott Smith and Smokey Robinson. Why? Because it's my backyard.
Yet Schopp and The Bulldog did a good job of catching the spirit of the thing, even if I disagree with the end result. Keith Richards and John Lennon wouldn't come near my list. I'd put Richards before Lennon, actually, as his friendship with Gram Parsons really helped shape what would later become Whiskeytown, Uncle Tupelo, and their offspring (Ryan Adams, Son Volt, Wilco).
I think you'd need to pick four categories that should be represented -- songwriter/storyteller, frontman, guitar "god" and a miscellaneous category including instrumental revolutionaries, rebels, performers and true rhythm and blues (Outta here, K-Ci and JoJo).
Before the "finalists," a caveat -- As a "McCartney guy," I am going to eliminate all The Beatles right away. As a group, they would unquestionably make it, but to pick one is unjust.
Here's who I would consider**:
Songwriter/storyteller -- Johnny Cash, Bob Dylan, Waylon Jennings, Buddy Holly, Bruce Springsteen
Springsteen is eliminated right off the bat because I don't think he would've existed without Dylan, Cash and Motown. Jennings goes away because he's definitely my music nerd choice, and Holly is gone because I think he's a notch below Dylan and Cash. Cash would be my personal choice, but Dylan is unquestionably the picture next to the definition of singer/songwriter. When I started typing this out, Cash was going to win this spot. Whoops. Integrity.
Actually, this wasn't a symbolic gesture by Dylan. The photo was snapped during the infamous "Dylan Throat Heist" performed by the nefarious Joan Baez.
Frontman/performer - Elvis Presley, Mick Jagger, Jim Morrison, David Bowie
Peace out, Jim Morrison. I bought The Doors' "Greatest Hits" early in high school, fell in love with some of the songs, and then two things happened in the early part of this decade.
One -- My best friend Bob Kiekbusch bought one of his spoken word poetry albums, and it remains one of the worst things to happen to recorded performance.
Two -- Local radio murdered The Doors by thinking everyone wanted to hear "Roadhouse Blues" at the top and bottom of every hour.
Bowie loses because of "Labyrinth," even though I know we all make mistakes and Jennifer Connolly is real good-looking. So, it's Jagger or Elvis. Maybe Mick's a victim of when he was born, but Elvis is Elvis.
His face belongs on my fake rock.
Guitar "god" -- Jimi Hendrix, Jimmy Page, Eric Clapton, Pete Townshend, Chuck Berry, Joe Strummer, Angus Young
I'm not a guitar player -- believe me, I've tried -- so I feel least confident in making this selection. I can tell you that Page and Townshend are my favorites, but I can also tell you that when my cousin Jim first showed me rock and roll, he showed me Hendrix, and I don't even think he was that huge a fan. It was just something anyone in music needed to hear. With apologies to the rest, he also wins the "Whose face is more recognizable?" test.
"Doctor, it burns when I..."
R&B, Other -- James Brown, Ray Charles, Stevie Wonder, Sam Cooke, Otis Redding
Stevie Wonder is still alive, and for some reason that is making me knock him off the list, even if "Fingertips" and "Uptight" are the highlights of the Motown boxed set. Otis Redding and Sam Cooke are less pivotal than the other two, which leaves Charles and Brown against each other, and the face test isn't conclusive.
Charles has more songs on the list of my all-time favorites, but Brown wins, if only for what I read in this book:
Great opening few chapters (Haven't read the whole thing yet).
**It is hurting me on the inside to not have included the following names who were so important to my formative musical years: Neil Young, The Band (Levon Helm), The Temptations, The Tragically Hip, Beastie Boys and Pearl Jam.
I can't believe I'm going to be flip, and wing a quick "Genre Halls of Fame" in this space, but hey, it'll be the first four I think off. I feel quite willing to edit these at any time:
Mount Rushmore of Hip-Hop: Grandmaster Flash, Chuck D., Tupac Shakur,
Deborah Harry, Jay-Z
Mount Rushmore of Hardcore/Punk: Henry Rollins, Ian MacKaye, Sid Vicious, Joey Ramone
Mount Rushmore of Metal: Lemme, Jimmy Page, James Hetfield, Angus Young
Email:
nick@wgr550.com
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