I am not any good at picking football games. Actually I was pretty good at it and had what I thought was a safe lead on Mike Schopp but then I fell apart and missed something like 11 out my last 12 picks and the result is I have to watch a season of a TV show chosen by Mike and Greg Bauch.
I want to die. Hoping for a power outage. Maybe a DVR malfunction.
Well this off to a pretty good start. The premier of Keeping Up With the Kardashians is only half an hour long. I was fearing maybe it would be some very special premier event that would go on over 3 nights or something. I hit play and one of them, Kim I think, is at a restaurant with Chris Humphries.
Did I miss the beginning? Boy, they're not wasting any time here at all. Within the first 30 seconds, Humphries, who is Kim's boyfriend, says he wants some of her food. She tells him "you always want what you can't have." Very deep. The timer on my DVR still says 0:00 and already the learning about life has commenced. I can't hardly wait to hear what other pearls of wisdom are going reveal themselves.
By the way, she can't share a plate of food?
Here are Khloe and Lamar Odom and his first line needs subtitles because he mumbles it. To be fair, I don't think he's had his coffee yet as Khloe is talking about waffles and sausage or something.
On to Kourtney and Scott. How many of these sisters are there? I hope this is it. I don't think I can handle another divergent story line. It appears that Kourtney and Scott have just moved into a new house. She says it will take "literally 10-years" to get the house organized.
Jenner house. Jenner's assistant is named Palm. This show isn't in HD which might be good for Jenner. If it were HD, I think there is a good chance he may look like a catcher's mitt that had been soaked in a tub of water and then left in the sun for a few years. In regular D, he just looks kind of shot.
The Mom is the manager for the three sisters. Kim wants to claim some 'K' names for the children she is going to have with a guy she in unwilling to share a plate of food with and we're still only 6 minutes in.
Game night at Kourtney's. Drama! Kim is not there. She's in NYC. Apparently that means that nothing interesting happens at game night because we're right on to a new scene and Mom/Manager has a meeting set up that the sisters are blowing off to teach her a lesson. They have not really established why Mom/Manager needs to be taught a lesson but that is likely on me. I can't expect to join a show like this in season 6 or whatever season this is and have everything from the previous seasons laid out. They have to keep moving. My bad.
The show is half over and my head hurts. A lot. I would have rather been assigned to learn and then explain the rules of Cricket to 1st graders than watch this show.
Mom/Manager is drinking wine out of a glass the size of Rob Ray's head and telling Jenner how the girls embarrassed her by blowing off the meeting. They decide to hire a chef so the family can have a dinner together. This is so relatable.
There is some friction when Kim discovers that there are pictures of her with her ex still on display in Khloe's house. The way they are talking one could get the impression that Kim "gets around". I am making no such judgement. She appears to me to be devoted to Chris although she would not share her food with him.
Family dinner at Jenner House complete with servers. Mom/Manager is drunk and Kim just found out she has the day off tomorrow. What a relief because she works so hard.
The episode ends with a blast of confusing teasers about story lines to come. Someone is drinking too much. One of the sisters hates Lamar. Someone else is taking birth control pills. Maybe Jenner, I don't know. It all happened so fast.
One week in and I'm already having trouble keeping up with the Kardashians.
See what I did there?